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Four Wide Racing
USA
0 Posts |
Posted - 04/22/2004 : 9:58:14 PM
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Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules: "I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want-and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on the table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?"
His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex here at 7pm every night.........whether your here or not." 
Husband & Wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding anniversary!
The Husband yells, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads, 'Here Lies MY Wife Cold As Ever'"
"Yeah?" she replies. "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads, 'Here Lies My Husband Stiff At Last'" 
Husband & his Wife are having a fight at the breakfast table. Husband gets up in a rage and says, "And you are no good in bed either," and storms out of the house.
After some time he realizes he was nasty and decides to make amends and rings her up. She comes to the phone after many rings, and the irritated Husband says, "What took you so long to answer the phone?"
She says "I was in bed"
"In bed this early, doing what?"
"Getting a 2nd opinion!" 
A man has 6 children & is very proud of his acheivment. He is so proud of himself, that he starts calling his Wife, "Mother of 6" in spite of her objections.
1 night, they go to a party. The man decides that it is time to go home & wants to find out if his Wife is ready to leave as well. He shouts at the top of his voice, "Shall we go home Mother of 6?"
His Wife, irritated by her husband's lack of discretion shouts right back, "Anytime you're ready, Father of 4." |
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